fenblogging

one interesting life and adventure with my hubby

Happy New Year!

I know it has been a while since I last posted. To be honest, I was so excited to be done with my bachelors, that the last thing I wanted to look at was my computer. There was a lot going on at the time, including a surprise I only recently announced over FB in the last two months. Yepp, I’m pregnant again. And it is another boy.

I had dreamed of a girl, and making all the cute girl things, but, baby boy #2 is healthy, and doing well. I have an anterior placenta, but it does not cover the exit, so I am all ready for a VBAC! And that has been a fight in and of itself. I was not really expecting the fight I am getting from a “supportive hospital”. But I will not give up, and I will probably have the baby at home, because of what I have been dealing with just in care for this babe. Amazing how one scar can suddenly eff my whole world up.

I found out I was pregnant in September, and everything has been going swimmingly. And by that I mean I just stopped puking for the most part. Yay. I went to the medical facility to get Zofran (because I exhausted every other remedy), and the OB who had to write the prescription was already trying to get me to have another c-section. What is it with male doctors not understanding the struggle of major surgery with 2 kids, stairs, 3k miles away from family, with very little support, and a husband who may not be home? Not his problem, just wants to play Operation. So I yelled at him to just write me the prescription, because I know what I need, and let me be on my way. 7 weeks is too early to be hearing that shit. I filed a complaint, waited for my meds, and called around for a midwife. Turns out not many take on VBAC patients unless they have a “proven pelvis”. Not helpful. One did agree to take me on, but I cannot afford her care, at 5k out of pocket because my insurance refuses to cover them when I have 2 hospitals within an hour of me. No fair.

I had in laws over, and some drama with it, but now that everyone is gone, I am happy as can be. I did actually get sick after getting the flu shot in the October/ November time frame, but nothing too bad. Hubby was a little bummed he couldn’t do that ritual he had for that day of the week, but I could not function and I needed him. I wish it was not made into the big deal that it was by him, but when I said I had man-flu, he got the hint.

I have been trying hard to eat well and not gain weight, or too much weight, and so far it is going well. I am only just now feeling like I may be showing, but most layperson has not noticed yet. My friends have, but they know me best. I bought one pair of maternity jeans at target, and have two dedicated thermal tops, and some other tanks and stuff that fit, but none of my other maternity jeans really feel good on me. The high band is definitely more comfortable with my flabby belly bulge still hanging around. I am trying not to go crazy, since this will likely be the last baby, especially if I fail my VBAC attempt. I cannot fathom trying to take care of 3 kids with 2 scars, or even 3.

With this babe, I have little to buy, and even less to expect for a baby shower. We kept all of little man’s clothes that we liked, and I started going through them Friday, and have a big box to make him a memory quilt, some to part with, and plenty to keep this one clothed. I just need more newborn stuff, and I am frustrated that they no longer seem to carry or make cuffed long sleeve shirts that can be used as mitten shirts. I lose the little mittens like crazy, as well as socks, never to be seen again. I was hoping to find some in Target or Wal-Mart, but was dissapointed. Carters is a bit of a hike, and we have had some snow and ice to make driving more perilous, so I will continue looking online.

Hubby has been enjoying some well deserved time off after a month of travel, of which little man and I did quite well. We decorated the house for the holidays, put up trees (he got a baby tree and ornaments), and watching movies and playing in the snow while it lasted. We do not get too much out here, which is nice. I had been crafting presents for the second cousins, and sent everything out before Christmas. I am sad that one of the packages got stolen in Alaska, and a card with pictures I sent to another friend was also ripped open and trashed. I hand crocheted stuffed animals for the kids, and was really upset that they were stolen. Little man and I made snowman ornaments, and sent them out, with some pictures to friends and family as well. Since it was our first year at home for the holidays, and in our own house, we had to have a good time.

Little man had a lot of loot for Christmas, my parents pulled out all the stops for him, and are very pleased to have a 2nd grandson coming to them now. My father in law is also excited.

No one however, in the family at least, wants to support my VBAC. They all seem to think I should have another section, but no one wants to be here to actually help me when the time comes, or cares about my mental and physical health if I do have another one. They seem to think I should just schedule it for their convenience and be done with it. My own husband has a hard time understanding this. All I wanted from the first pregnancy test in 2013 was to push the baby out with no drugs, no IV, and maybe at home, because he could not get out of work in time. No one seems to understand my frustration, but I have C-section friends who understand the pain and struggle all too well, and are supporting me instead.

I am now planning a homebirth for my 2nd child, and trying to read and study all I can so I am not unprepared for the endeavor. I will have friends help me with my little man, and help me through this new and exciting time. I am not afraid of labor, I am afraid of another surgery. I have not heard good things about the hospitals out here in the west coast regarding care during birth from friends. I feel my best option is to just not go until after I have the baby.

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